Cancer Update: Scan results and Boundaries

Well, today we are taking a break from When Things Fall Apart, but don't worry, there are still a few posts ready to finish analyzing this book.

In the meantime, here's an update.

I had my brains scanned a week or so ago, right? I got the results just a couple of days later, but I needed some time to process the information before I put it out there. As a reminder, I am very open about the horrors of this diagnosis most of the time, but that does not mean that I am obligated to share with you every medical detail of my life.

Anyway, there is good news: There no significant change to the size of my teeny-tiny tumor, so my doctor wants to stick with the current plan and re-check my brains in a few months. Right now, they are not worried about me, and from what I can tell, the lack of urgency on their part means that there is nothing to worry about doing.

I am doing maintenance chemo, and I am going to continue that for at least the next six months, I think, unless something significant changes in the scans of my brains. That part, I am not looking forward to. Chemo SUCKS,  and even though they say that oral chemo is supposed to be more easily tolerated than IV chemo, it still SUCKS.

For a little while, I was feeling really good, and now, I'm not. It happens. Nothing out of the ordinary for a patient with my diagnosis to feel good, then feel bad, then feel good again, and so forth and so on and what have you. It's a cycle.

Remember that bus that could hit me tomorrow? I feel like it just revved its engine to remind me that it's there, but luckily, for now, it's not going anywhere.

I am still frustrated by many parts of my diagnosis. I feel like there is so much waiting involved, and I am not a naturally patient person. Right now, I am at the point in the cycle where I am cranky, and tired, and generally grumpy. I know that I will feel better, because it is a cycle of ups and downs, but right now, I just want off this ride.